Live as you’re dead.

看到这篇想起自己曾经的「明日即逝」计划:

每天都做好明天迎接死亡的准备。

A clean, well-lighted place.

 

 

I never used to think living like a dead person would be my wish someday.

Since my childhood, I’ve thought about being a lawyer, a singer, a diplomat, a writer, a news anchor, a columnist, a coffee shop owner, a book store clerk, a boutique salesgirl……all these fancies based on one common assumption, that life is a positive thing and I want to live the most out of it. Unfortunately I have thousands of doubts about that now. It’s not in a bad way, you should now.

I try to reflect on myself for some moments everyday, but the pure loneliness makes me unable to clear my thoughts every time. When people start to pity him/herself, all of his/her judgments become unjustifiable. Hence I realize that I need to get rid of the self-pity thing before any thoughts come up. It’s difficult and almost impossible, but worth a…

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当我们谈论爱情时,我们在谈论什么

[美]雷蒙德·卡佛(RAMOND CARVER) (1938—1988)

我的朋友梅尔麦克吉尼斯在不停地说着。梅尔麦克吉尼斯是个心脏病医生,有时候,这种身份给了他这样说话的权力。

    我们四人围坐在梅尔家的餐桌旁喝杜松子酒。从水池后面大窗户照进来的阳光充满了厨房。四人里有我、梅尔、梅尔的第二任妻子特芮萨(我们叫她特芮)和我的妻子劳拉。那时我们住在阿尔伯克基。但我们都是从外地来的。

    餐桌上放着冰桶。杜松子酒和奎宁水被不停地传来传去,不知怎么的,我们就谈到爱情这个话题上来了。梅尔认为真正的爱情决不次于精神上的爱。他说他离开去上医学院时,已在神学院里呆了五年,他说回顾在神学院的那些日子,仍然觉得那是他一生中最重要的时光。

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